I can hear you. In the waves of my space I hear your heartbeat. Eyes pulse through a kaleidoscope of reverberating paisley designs. The notes edge outward beyond my line of sight. I watch as the show begins. A shimmering spectacle as central vision disappears…if only for a moment. Then time, unfettered by containment lines, sends searing pain. Hello again unwelcome stranger.
DEE GRANT 2021
In this short piece I have tried to capture an eye migraine. ‘Unfettered by containment lines’ means that I didn’t take anything to resolve it. As many would know that suffer from eye migraines, if you treat it as soon as the signs appear you can sometimes avoid it turning into a migraine.
For me these make you cry with pain. Even the sound of water dripping on tiles makes your head scream. Showers become painful necessities. Light to your eyes is pure agony so no TV and no screen time. Have I done it justice?
Photo by lilartsy from Pexels
I know the dark space that operations and medication can do to your headspace. This cards for mum. After a second operation less than a couple of weeks apart I know she’s struggling. When a loved one is in hospital you can’t always be with them, especially these days. That makes things so tough. Wish I could be there with her. This short poem is for her.
Love you to the moon and back but get that things are hard
Thinking of you heaps today so thought I'd send this card
Imagine I am sitting there on your bed and all
We'll laugh at life's twists and turns...beats staring at a wall!
We'll chat of meds that work best or needles that you score
The kindness of your nurses and patients that do snore
This place is a pitstop and it's bumpy on the way
So seatbelt on, hold on tight, lets take it day by day
BY DEE GRANT 2021
Photo by Jacob Kelvin.J on Pexels.com
With grinding teeth and sobbing tears my recent hopes, my greatest fears, came tumbling down into a mess. I hate these times I must confess. Cause when your world comes tumbling down there’s no-one there to ease that frown, and so you dwell upon each thing you cannot change…it sure does sting.
You can’t change what has happened and though a scar remains, that scar remains an emblem of life’s struggles and it’s pains. There is no silver lining. Your tears they’ll come to naught. Regardless of the matter nor how you feel distraught.
So come on there brave soldier, let’s once more bare the load. Take up your pack upon your back, trudge forward on the road. Just remember it’s a journey with blissful times and pain. So focus on the good stuff and stamp them in your brain.
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My husband is stuck with me here in my pain, for better or worse must drive him insane
Today another day I wish I was away, away from the pain of my everyday. Though I live in a place that people would love, all I feel is pain and I pray to above. I pray to above for a bit of reprieve, cause I’m locked in this body with no way to leave.
It’s autoimmune they’ll remind me. Yes it sucks when at night your muscles twitch and weave. Yes we know you’re in pain, what meds can we give, what stretches, what counselling, to make life worth the live? But I know through experience from years on this road, there’s no silver lining just carry the load.
BY DEE GRANT
I think that what had me ‘gobsmacked’ was how many people I know took great pleasure in reminding me of how painful, and expensive, it will be to have an implant. Yeah thanks guys. So I was ‘chuffed’ when one of my mates referred me to someone she’d used in the past. “I didn’t feel a thing” she said. Thanks luv! I don’t care that it might not be exactly true. It’s exactly what I needed to hear. Sometimes you need something like that to ‘set the wheels in motion’ and it’s not that good dentist’s are ‘rare as hens teeth’ but more that when you move to a new suburb your ‘going in blind’. Horror stories going around and around in your head as you remember that needle coming out of your mouth bent and bloody from when you were a kid. How deep did they go?
Phrase or idiom meaning
- Scares the living daylights out of me – feel extremely scared
- Gobsmacked – so surprised you can’t speak
- Chuffed – very pleased
- Set the wheels in motion – to start a process
- Rare as hen’s teeth – hens don’t have teeth, rare, non-existent
- Going in blind – no previous knowledge of
- Right on the money – accurate, correct
- In this day and age – this present time
- I shudder to think – something not pleasant to think about