Know what our wishes are

(2 min read) “OK that’s set in concrete. You now all know what our wishes are”. Wish that was true.

When dad passed away suddenly in his 80s things were surreal. Things were a blur. Sis hired a skip bin and all the kids went up on the same day to empty the house. “Anyone want the TV”? No. Chuck. “What about these fishing rods”?”Yep I’ll take them”.

In a day a lifetime of memories were sorted. Too quick. Not a time to reflect or greive loss. The place stripped for sale.

But I remember;

“Hows it going Dad”? I’d say.

“Pretty good when you consider the alternative” He’d say with a slight grin on his face.

Now gone these past 5 years.

Know what their wishes are.

As friends we support each other as best we can as our parents get older. One friend has a mum with dementia who thinks someone is breaking into the backyard each night. She doesn’t know what to do. She watches as the mum she once knew fades away.

Another refuses to have visits from her children due to Covid.  That vibrant mum you know has become frail and fearful.

A dad moves to a remote village in Thailand in his senior years and later dies. The language barrier makes it a nightmare to get him relocated back home from overseas for burial.

Know what their wishes are.

As friends we all have our stories. Not everyone has their power of attorney in place. If the doctor asks “do they want to be revived” do we know the answer? What is involved in being the executor when that day arrives? What do you do if your parent dies intestate in a foreign land? How did they want to be remembered?

My folks set everything out in concrete when they were in their 70’s. While they tweaked things you had guidance. You had it early in the piece so you able to respect their wishes. Cause sometimes they get confused. Mum will say “I dont know what to do” and I know how to answer her concerns.

Dezzie 2022

Stay close everyone.

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