#True story: Spit and gargle language

When I was eight I fell off the slippery dip at the park and snapped my front teeth in half. Mom in tears to show her and thus began my dental journey. Going to the dentist, it ‘scares the living daylights out of me’. It’s nothing personal. My teeth just have a history. The latest, getting an implant. Next time don’t fall down the front stairs and crack your tooth!

I think that what had me ‘gobsmacked’ was how many people I know took great pleasure in reminding me of how painful, and expensive, it will be to have an implant. Yeah thanks guys. So I was ‘chuffed’ when one of my mates referred me to someone she’d used in the past. “I didn’t feel a thing” she said. Thanks luv! I don’t care that it might not be exactly true. It’s exactly what I needed to hear. Sometimes you need something like that to ‘set the wheels in motion’ and it’s not that good dentist’s are ‘rare as hens teeth’ but more that when you move to a new suburb your ‘going in blind’. Horror stories going around and around in your head as you remember that needle coming out of your mouth bent and bloody from when you were a kid. How deep did they go?

A good dentist not only does a great job but they make you feel like everything will be OK. They are ‘right on the money’. There’s always going to be prodding and poking or times when your jaw just locks up. When you have that really good dentist. Now they’re the ones who also have this uncanny ability of being able to understand exactly what you say when your mouths full of plastic and metal and cotton. Man how do they do that? Feels like they do professional development on spit and gargle language, or something like that.

We are so fortunate to have the opportunity to have dental care that is so good ‘in this day and age’ . I take solace in knowing it was only early last century when they used to pull all your teeth out. You could get your very own dentures. It was even a gift some people got for their wedding present. ‘I shudder to think’.

 
Phrase or idiom meaning
  • Scares the living daylights out of me – feel extremely scared
  • Gobsmacked – so surprised you can’t speak
  • Chuffed – very pleased
  • Set the wheels in motion – to start a process
  • Rare as hen’s teeth – hens don’t have teeth, rare, non-existent
  • Going in blind – no previous knowledge of
  • Right on the money – accurate, correct
  • In this day and age – this present time
  • I shudder to think – something not pleasant to think about
 

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